Ahoy!

Tell me, is there something about pilchards I should know?

In the ever-increasing search for oily fish replete with omega-3s, I came across a nice little tin of South Atlantic pilchards in Kwik-Save. In a can made from recycled steel, too.

I don't remember if my mum ever went in for pilchards much when I was a boy. Sardines, yes, and tuna, but pilchards I just don't know.

Anyway, pushed as I am for time, what with hanging the show tomorrow and the pictures not being quite finished, I thought, "What could be easier and quicker than some pilchards with boiled new potatoes and some green beans? After all, it's Friday and even if I'm not religious, that makes it an even better excuse."

And they were rather nice, like fatter sardines. All the more omega-3s, I expect.

Why then have I spent the evening between the easel and the loo?

I'm just getting to the tricky bit of the Madonna at her cash desk, when I think...uh oh...gotta go. This has not been an easy night and the pictures are going to be - at the very least - tacky when Mo and Mr Grumpy call round for me at 9.30.

But then Mo's been standing her latest in front of the fan heater trying to dry it, without success.

I think we might have to have a Varnishing Day.